Will Trade Woodstove for FireWood

There's a section in our local paper's classifieds called "Swap Shop". Though the wordcounts are sparse, the stories seep in from the edges...

"Will trade woodstove for firewood..." Hmmm. Moving out of doors?

"Will trade firewood for 20 lbs of ham." OK, let's see. A logger is suffering from a severe lack of salt, and his doctor recommends increasing the amount of ham in his diet. Ham is expensive, but the poor guy has an unlimited supply of wood....

"Swap five and a half year old Siamese cat for dog." Perhaps a couple split, and the man got the house and the cat. He'd prefer a dog. That damn cat is as cranky and whiny as his ex....

and the next week:

"Will swap five and a half year old Siamese cat for $15." Maybe no suitable dog was available for the value of the cat. But how do you place the value of a five and a half year old cat at $15? Is there some calculation based on lives? And how did this ad get past the editors - doesn't the "swap" of $15 make this a bonafide classified??

"Blowdart gun available for paintball setup." After nailing his kid in the eye, the guy's wife forced him to switch hobby weapons?

"16" tires will swap for boat trailer." But boy, it's gonna be hard to drag that trailer without any tires on the truck, eh?

I suppose the Swap Shop appeals to the Mexican-market-bargainer or the Garage Sale Markdown shopper in all of us...but hey? Who can pass up that kind of deal, huh?